Dubbed by the BBC as the “diva of divorce for the super-rich,” YPO member Ayesha Vardag learned early how to overcome adversity, which helped her navigate huge barriers to build one of the largest family law offices in the U.K., Vardags LTD.
The only child of a divorced single working mother – and then herself a divorced single working mother raising her own two children – Vardag shares her unconventional path to success, and what she has learned along the way about entrepreneurship and high net worth divorces.
Not fitting in
Vardag grew up in an Anglo-Scottish home in Oxford, England, with her English mother. Her mother – pregnant with Vardag – had left her father, a politician who was to become Pakistan’s youngest-ever senator.
“At school, I faced various forms of racist bullying. I was an English girl with an English accent but looked different. No group accepted or recognized me; not the Brits and not the South Asians,” she says, adding that being an only child raised by a single mother also made her feel different.
Education was her escape. “My mother prioritized education and worked hard to put me in the best academic schools. She used to say, you can be anything. You can become a prime minister if you want. Growing up, ‘don’t waste your potential’ became my mantra,” adds Vardag.
She went on to study law at the University of Cambridge, earning a scholarship to complete a master’s degree in European law in Brussels. “For a short while, I tried to go down more creative paths, like journalism and TV production. But each time, I chose something more solid and went back to law. I was very conscious about the importance of being financially secure.”
A not-so-straight line to success
While Vardag was building her career in financial law, she married a co-worker and moved to the firm’s Moscow office. “My career became secondary to his, and I had eventually to give it up so he could become partner,” she says. In 1997, with a small child and another on the way, she left her husband and returned to London. “There were top city firms who wanted me, but when they found out I had a child and was pregnant, they ghosted me.”
Vardag found a job in a New York law firm in London and worked long hours without full-time help. Then she cross-qualified as a barrister but quit when her marriage broke down and she was told by her chambers that a divorced single mother wouldn’t be able to make it at the Bar.
— Ayesha Vardag, Founder and President of Vardags, one of the largest family law offices in the U.K. share
“My whole world came crashing down at once. But although it was devastating at the time, it was ultimately my good fortune as the destruction of that life allowed me to start building the life that I really wanted to have,” says Vardag.
She worked alongside her divorce lawyer on her own divorce, and he later offered her a job. But after about a year she was obliged to leave, pregnant in another relationship.
Vardag taught the family law course at the five-star law school at Queen Mary, University of London. She lost that baby and suffered acute depression but then she and her partner had a little girl.
Vardag supplemented her academic salary by renting rooms in her home to lodgers, but it wasn’t enough. She decided to return to law, starting her own family law firm. She explains, “I didn’t want to work for someone else anymore. I realized I would never blend in. So, in 2005, I launched Vardags from my home.”
Today, Vardags is one of the leading matrimonial law firms in Britain, with 110 employees, two main headquarters in London and Manchester, and a client base from around the world, including Monaco and Dubai. In the landmark 2010 Supreme Court case of Radmacher v Granatino, Vardags reversed several centuries of law, making prenuptial agreements effective in England for the first time. In 2017, she won for former Miss Malaysia, Pauline Chai, the right to have her case heard in the English courts, getting her a £64 million award when in Malaysia she would have received nothing.
Along the way, Vardag has received numerous awards in recognition of her entrepreneurship achievements, including the recent Woman of the Year GG2 Awards 2023, which celebrates the extraordinary talent that exists in the British Asian community.
Breaking barriers and stereotypes
Reflecting on her experience representing heirs and heiresses, tycoons, celebrities and royalty, Vardag recalls, “When I was setting up my first firm, people were asking, ‘who is she?’ I decided I don’t care if everyone laughed at me. Today, Vardags is the leading family law firm, and moreover I believe there is no other woman founder leading a law firm of significant size in any sector.” She attributes her success to various factors.
– The belief that if you build it, they will come. “As an entrepreneur, you have to have faith that you will succeed. I remember being inspired by lyrics of a Gwen Stefani song, “What You Waiting For?” And Kevin Costner’s film, “Field of Dreams”, where he was repeatedly told in a dream ‘If you build it, they will come.’”
Vardag had no business education when she got started. “You have to let go of fear and self-doubt and take the leap. Do it, and don’t think about it. Above all, talk to everyone about your work, and eventually, clients inform new clients.”
– Courage to carve your own skill set and leadership style. Vardag’s reputation as Britain’s leading divorce lawyer is based on commercial savvy and willingness to speak out. She believes her experience as a divorced single mother has also made her a more compassionate lawyer. “People come to me because they want more than a classic divorce lawyer. I look at historical cases, fundamental justice and at my own experience of divorce,” she says. “I’m emotionally empathetic but combine that emotion with calm objectivity. My career has always, essentially, been part lawyer, part mentor, part therapist.”
– Build a strong corporate culture based on core shared values. “The most important value is to bring your personality to work. Everyone on my team is resilient and tough but also very supportive and collaborative. I want people to bring their humor, emotions and creativity to work. I want clients to feel invigorated, inspired and involved when they meet our lawyers. It’s not all about hard law and facts. Divorce is such a human area that it’s as much about the ability to connect with your client as it is about legal strategy.” Vardag has brought back a full in-office community and says that it was a game changer for returning to a happy, robust work force sharing knowledge, creativity and laughter in the face of adversity.
– A strong vision with discipline. Having a clear vision has been a driving force in Vardag’s success. “Leadership is fundamentally a combination of vision and making decisions,” she says. “If you have no clear vision, then decisions become purely reactive. You lose the capacity to make the hard decisions as well as losing confidence and creativity in your work.”
Vardag’s divorce helped her start her successful career, but it also led to another kind of partnership. In 2010, she met her present husband who used his ex-McKinsey and entrepreneurial expertise to become the CEO of the firm, helping Vardags become one of one of the fastest growing companies in Europe.
“My husband and I have a hugely symbiotic relationship,” she says. “But from my previous personal and my professional experience, I can say thank God divorce is now common. People trapped in dead and unhappy relationships, who are undermined at home, will not be able to lead fulfilling lives or have confidence at work.”
Stressing that relationships are complex and often break when the person you’re with is no longer the person that you married, she adds, “If you have a good supportive spouse and are in a harmonious relationship, this is immensely positive. If not, it can be actively destructive, and it is far better to end it in a civilized way and open the door for a more positive relationship.”
